Tag Archive: my two cents.

nothing to see here.

It’s been a little bit since I posted, so here are some updates:

Bunny is in full on toddler mode and is wearing.me.out.  The fits are what really have me over the edge.  But, I know it’s what she’s supposed to be doing for her age, but still.  Good  LORD.  I think yesterday was by far the worst day yet.  It’s just the temper tantrums.  And the whining. And the constant indecisiveness.  UGH.

Went to a spa night last night hosted by the mother’s club that I am a member of.  It was at a local posh hotel and we got to lounge around the hot tubs and be loverly ladies and not mommies.  I, of course, had to say some highly inappropriate things that made for awkward silences and crickets chirping.  Which, in hindsight, really makes me realize what a FOOL I was when I was out drinking as I would never have stopped with the lame remarks.  Thankfully, I only made a slight fool out of myself twice last night.  But it was a bit eye opening and it also made me realize that I REALLY need some time out away from hubby and bunny more often.  With actual adults in actual adult settings.  Thank god I at least have my book club once a month.  But clearly, that is not enough.

Went home last weekend and it was a great, albeit short, visit.  This time I didn’t make any plans and just let things fall into place.  Normally I plan to see a ton of people and feel wiped out by the end.  This time it was more mellow and relaxing.  And the best part of my whole weekend was a trip to Nordstroms for a bra fitting.  Oh yes.  It was such a joy.  Friends have told me how great it is to finally have a bra that fits you properly and well, they were RIGHT.  It is amazing.  And I was TOTALLY wearing the wrong size.  Yeah, I was wearing a 32B when I should have been wearing a 30DD!  WTF?!  Or I can wear a 32D.  Wow.  I mean, I knew I was big but holy cow, batman.  I was totally checking out the other gals at the spa night last night to see how I sized up, and yep.  I was SO MUCH larger than the rest of ’em.  But man.  Does a well fitting bra make ALL the difference in the world!

I still maintain that I have the bestest most awesomest friends on the planet.  And I love that I have friends everywhere.  Yes, sometimes it’s sad that I don’t have a lot of friends where I live, then I realized, who am I kidding?!  I have tons of friends here.  I just need to get out of my head sometimes and realize that.  Being in my head for too long is a bad place to be.  Thankfully, I don’t get stuck there that often anymore.

I have a stalker of sorts on FB and it is driving me INSANE.  INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE!  INSANE IN THE BRAIN!  uh..sorry.  But seriously.  I have a friend who finds the need to post on EVERY SINGLE STATUS or pretty much every photo or at least like every comment or link that I post.  And they aren’t always nice comments, either.  It’s is tres annoying, to say the least.



So I watched this gnarly movie with hubby the other day. And I must admit, I watched the whole thing with my mouth open in utter disbelief. Then I made two of my friends watch the movie, too.  I mean, I’ve always laughed at the stigma of being whisky tango, but, well, I’ve never seen anything documented so realistically.  It was crazy.  Literally.  Each and every person in that family is certifiably bat shit crazy.  It makes me so glad that I am not like that.  Like any of that.  Oh, sure, I have my moments of crazy, but NOTHING like that.  But watching that made me so grateful that I have so much in my life.

I have the most amazing friends a girl could ever want.  I don’t know where I would be without them.  Each and every one is so very dear to me.  It’s also amazing that when the shit hits the fan, like it recently did, to see who will stand up and be my friend.  I just needed a shoulder to cry on, an ear to vent in and arms to be hugged with.  And I was met with so much love.  And that’s really all I ask for from my friends.  Love.  Compassion.  Kindness.  It’s funny that the same day that I posted this “True friends don’t care if you’re broke, you’re slightly mental at times, you can’t keep a secret, your house is a mess, or your family is filled with crazies…they love you for who you are. A true friend can go long periods of time without speaking and never question their friendship. REPOST if you are lucky enough …to have at least one true friend ” on facebook, I ended up needing my friends the most. I am so thankful to have friends who are there for me.  Friends who are true and honest.  But while I don’t want fluff and sugar-coating, I also don’t want tough love.  I have had more than enough tough love to last a lifetime.

I am blessed to have two loving cats.  Oh sure, that might sound silly to think I am blessed with having loving animals, but they love me unconditionally.  They just know when things are bad and when I need extra love.  They watch over Bunny, which I know sounds odd, but they do.  They treat her like a little sister.  I love that they know when I need extra comfort.  I love that they cuddle up with me like no one else.  I love that Sawyer will sleep on my head and Atticus will sleep under the covers with me at night.

I am so glad that I am a smart, educated woman.  I am glad that I worked and had a career for a good 10 years before I had Bunny.  I’m glad that if I had to go back to work, I could and would be able to demand a decent salary.  I am also so very glad that I have not had to back to work yet.  I believe my time has been better spent at home with her.  I also know that is not for everyone and that some of my friends are  better parents because they work and don’t stay home with their little ones.  But that is not the case for me, at least right now.  And if I do have to go to work, I hope to God it’s because I want to and not for any other reason.

I guess I like watching movies like that or shows like this to really make me realize what I DO have in life rather than focus on the things that I DON’T.  Watching things like that also make me realize what a strong person I really am and that I put up with a lot of crap.  One of my girlfriends once told me that I was really strong because I do so much on my own when it comes to raising Bunny and that I should be proud of myself.  And you know what?  I am proud.  Yes, I would LOVE for help some days, but I only want help if it comes willingly and not begrudgingly.  I think that also makes me a better mom.  I want to do everything in my power to make sure Bunny has a wonderful, warm and loving life.  And you know what?  I think I am already doing just that.

on parenting.

What a difference a year makes.  Or 20 months, to be sure.  I never knew what kind of parent I would be as I wasn’t ever so sure that I actually wanted to have children.  But, when we found out I was pregnant, we never looked back.  But now, well, I wouldn’t change a thing for the world.   I think not having any expectations is what has helped me the most.  Sure, I have bat shit crazy tough days, but don’t we all?  And they eventually go away.  I know that Bunny is just a little kid and most of what she does is because she just doesn’t know any better.  She’s only 20 months old, for crissake, so it’s not like she is intentionally pushing my buttons.  And I know I am the boss of her and not the other way around.  It just kills me when I see parents who let their kids rule their worlds.  Like they are mere players in their kids production of life.  Sure, to a small point we are, but that doesn’t happen until they are MUCH older.  Not when they are under 2.  Or even under 3.

It drives me insane when I talk to parents who won’t go out because their kid doesn’t handle shopping centers well.  Or the kid doesn’t like being in a car seat.  Or they won’t give their kid refined sugar until they are 2.  And other such nonsense.  Okay, so I totally understand not wanting to go shopping with your toddler when it is nap time.  Or when they are hungry.  But seriously.  To not want to shop because they can’t handle it is a bit much for me.  But then that begs the question, just what in the world are you shopping for?  I mean, a routine trip to Target or to Safeway really shouldn’t be that bad.  Should it?  YOU have the power to say NO.  And of course you don’t drag them around for hours on end.  I would meltdown at the end of that, too!  I know one girl who didn’t leave her house for MONTHS because her toddler threw such a fit getting into the car seat.  Um…seriously?  I was just baffled.  Sure, Bunny throws a fit every now and then, but well, I shove my knee in between her little legs and get her all buckled in.  Once the car is in motion, she’s normally fine.  I just could not imagine being stuck at home just because of my fussy kid.  I would literally go insane.  And by no means am I saying that shopping is super easy, just that it’s not the end of the freaking world, either.

And I really don’t understand the whole not feeding your kid refined sugar until their are 2.  Now, I’m all for feeding good, healthy things to your kiddos.  Heck, I’ve gone as organic as I can, save for the kraft mac and cheese.  And perhaps the random other goodies that call my name at the store.  But seriously, I think sugar in moderation is just fine.  I made Bunny’s baby food for a really long time, which was really simple, but once she started eating more solid, grown up food, I just made sure what she was eating was healthy.  I do shop organic or extra healthy for the most part, but having a delicious Mc Donalds french fry every once in a while isn’t going to kill her.  Or me.  And I buy a ton of whole grain goodies and we have fresh fruit and veggies all the time.  And pretty much all of our meat comes off the land from my super hunter husband.  But I was so freaking sad when I went to several birthday parties over the past year where the kids weren’t allowed to have real sugar in their cakes and cupcakes.  I mean, really.  I guess for me, it’s all about moderation.  Bunny doesn’t jones for sugar, but she knows it’s a special treat.  And it’s just not the same to use fake sugar in a cupcake.  That is plain EVIL.  And don’t even get me started on the parents that gave their kid a whole grain muffin for in lieu of a birthday cupcake.  wtf is wrong with people?!

Ah, and then there is the topic of television.  Now, I don’t normally use the TV as a babysitter, but if Elmo does happen to come on when I need to do the dishes or fold the laundry, then so be it.  But I’m not sitting Bunny in front of the boob tube for hours on end, either.  usually. I just don’t understand not letting your kid watch any TV.  And by TV, I mean programming that is age appropriate.  Like Sesame Street.  I actually know a few people who won’t let their kids watch the beloved show because they think it is crap.  Oh, jeez.  Really.  Sorry you don’t want your kid to earn to color, count or dance by some fuzzy monsters.  But, these are also the same people who are insistent that their kids are gifted and are already gearing up for sending them to Waldorf schooling.  And while I’m on the topic, a girl I know actually is actually pissed off that the ABC Family channel has shows on that talk about sex.  The show in question?  A tween show with Hilary Duff.  Um…seriously?  If your tween doesn’t know what sex is, you’ve got bigger problems.  You can only shelter your kids for so long.  And sheltering is bad.  Sheltering leads to kids who literally go nuts when they are finally free of the restraints, both literally and figuratively.

I just want Bunny to grow up being a happy, self reliant, self assured kid.  But she needs to know that I am the boss and what I say goes.  Well, at least until she is taller than me.  Oh wait.  That won’t be for very much longer…..